Am I Putting My Partner At Risk?
CAN MY PARTNER TRUST ME?
What I do that results in my partner not trusting me:
____ 1. I minimize a problem she tells me about if it doesn’t seem that important to me.
____ 2. I make a joke out of an issue I know she’s sensitive about.
____ 3. I belittle something she does in front of others.
____ 4. I lecture her on what she should do to solve a problem she tells me she is having.
____ 5. If I have had a bad day, I don’t listen to or I brush off the things she says are of concern to her or a story she tells me.
____ 6. I take what she says well; on other days she may say the same thing ad I’ll respond with criticism, blaming, or anger.
____ 7. I get angry if she expresses an opinion on a subject that is different from my opinion.
____ 8. I don’t notice the things she says she does for me, but I have an eye for the things I believe she failed to do or did in a way that doesn’t suit me.
____ 9. I make negative remarks about women in general if I see or hear something that annoys me.
Any behavior we use on a sporadic or occasional basis to put down our partner increases mistrust and is abusive. She will start to withhold information, bottle up her feelings, or feel like she’s walking on eggshells.
Trust requires consistency. Mistrust and control thrive on inconsistency.